NFL

The NFL , or National Football League is the largest professional American football league in the world .
Sounds impressive , yes ?

Think again assholes .

The NFL is the biggest American football league in the world purely because there's no competition . No one cares about American Football .


Reasons for my statement :
1 . There is no American football World Cup
2 . There are no major competitions involving American football that the world cares about . (even the Olympics ignore them . In your face , padding-toting pansies)
3 . It involves Americans

Where real sports ends , NFL begins

American Football is the gayest sport in the world . Real football ( soccer , to all you American scum ) , tennis , rugby , cricket , badminton , swimming , bowling , ice skating , skateboarding , Formula 1 , flower arranging , gymnastics , athletics , weightlifting , croquet , golf , fishing , archery , shooting , and even ballet are better than American football .

We're talking hairy eyeballs here .

What's not to like about the NFL ?
After all , it IS 11 men covered in padding running at each other in the sole hope of advancing an oval shaped " ball " toward a giant post. Sure sounds like rugby , doesn't it ?
Maybe I'm just drunk .
( For any lucky American fortunate enough to stumble upon these reasons as to why your sport sucks , rugby is a REAL mans game . )

THIS is a man's sport, you sodding Yanks

So they steal the concept from rugby . I suppose I can live with that.
But then, they invaded the territory of the one of the best sports to have ever graced this earth after tennis .

Football .

Even Chuck Norris wouldn't stand a chance

Everyone knows not to mess with football .

It's like dissing Al Capone in Chicago in the 1920's .

If the world of sport was based on marking ones territory , football would be the giant rockhound which pissed everywhere and totally owned .

Football ( other than tennis ) is the greatest sport ever played by man. If the Greeks knew about football back then , Zeus would rain giant footballs at his enemies in the age old myths , not pussy ass lightning bolts .

I mean, everyone knows that only , Chuck Norris can wield lightning bolts and rock tits .

Zeus doesn't stand a chance .

If football existed back then , Sparta wouldn't win due to their soldiers with rippling muscles and awesome fighting formations , they would merely play football so manly that all other states would give up their women and children to slavery .

The only downside is that the manliest movie ever made , 300 , wouldn't exist in the way we know it .

They would still kill the Persians

The fact that American football stole the very NAME of football though , is what pisses me off the most .
American football has nothing in common with real football .


Football ( other than tennis ) kicks American football's ass , there's simply no competition . Even hooligans that belong to real football kick more ass .

Lastly , let's just conveniently forget the fact that they don't actually use their feet in American football !

Sure puts the FOOT in football !



I mean , this " sport " has even spawned countless movies and television series which capitalize on the glamor of American football .

Examples include , The Longest Yard and Friday Night Live .

All this just brainwashes the general public that American football is a ' glorious ' and ' honourable ' port , whereas in reality ,

It's something Koreans would play .

" He " would play American football .

A sport that encourages men to wear padding and bumps

into each other is NOT a sport .

Look at rugby , all they wear are tight shirts , shorts , socks, cleats and helmets for those who have undergone brain surgery .

And when they clash , they sure clash with a vengeance .

This is as similar as 2 male rhinos with raging hormones clashing over the last female rhino in the world .

Even when rhinos do this , they clash harder .

But that's all from me for now . Feel free to comment if you're a brainless , dimwitted and half-brained American football fan .

No marks for guessing , but if you are , I'd guess that you'd be American .


Basketball and soccer are getting old ,
Tennis however , is just beginning .




L♥ve ,
Jaden