Married ... with children (B&N style)

So, this bitch comes into the bookstore today. Told me she wanted to see a Nook. How fortuitous for her that I was standing there, and I am, in fact, the Nook person.

She noticed my nametag and commented about how the spelling of my name was interesting.

I gave the usual joke I do when people say that: "Well, I'd like to say  my mom can't spell, but it is, in fact, the rest of the world who can't."

She goes, "Yeah, do I really care? No, you spell it however you want."

Um, that was bitchy. But okay.

So, right before she came up, I noticed the Nook was down to a 13% charge and I wanted to put it on the charger. Unfortunately the back-up wasn't charged either so I was sort of screwed. I took it off the charger and started to "show her around" the Nook. Here's the thing ... when the Nook's battery starts getting low, the touchscreen's response time slows way down. Like insanely. So I kept tapping things and it wasn't doing what I wanted.

She goes, "Well, that's positive, isn't it?"

Really? Don't judge my gadget because it's tired and needs to recharge. I mean, seriously, I'm sure if you're not in bed by 6:30 every night you get cranky and slow down too. Give my poor Nook a break.

I could tell from the get-go she had no desire to buy one anyway, she was just one of those older ladies who was in the store and had heard about this new-fangled gadget and figured she'd be the "popular" one at the quilting bee if she had ventured into this sort of new technology. She bragged about how she "understood" her Blackberry to me, but made comments to her friend about how she hadn't figured it all out yet. I don't really have hope for you to understand the Nook, sweetheart.

Luckily for me, not everyone I do a Nook demo for is quite so bitchy, or clueless. But you know, every village has an idiot. Got news for you, if your village's resident idiot went missing, she was in Hamburg today. Please, take her back. (And buy a Nook while you're at it. You'll thank me. I promise.)