Today was the ultimate day in lessons in karma. What goes around comes around. This time it wasn't me or Scott ... it was Munchkin! First lesson in karma at two-years-old. She's in for a rough life, huh?
This afternoon we opted to go to Carino's in Hamburg for lunch because they have the most awesome wedge salads. Of course, our reasons are not important. (Though, might I point out that when I asked Jocelyn if she wanted a cheeseburger while we were in the car figuring out where to go, she agreed. Had I listened to her, we never would have gone down this path. Okay, so it's all my fault.)
Anyway, we were seated at a booth and as usual, no booster seat (she hates them anyway), just "trapped" between me and the wall of the booth. She zeroed in on the giant bottle of olives and other crap decorating the ledge between the booths. We thwarted her, told her it was hot. (Hey, it works, don't judge me for lying to her.) She calmed down and ate some of the pesto pizza (very good, by the way) and lunch was going very well.
Out of nowhere, she reached up to the giant glass container of olives and before Scott and I could register what she was about to do, she pushed it right off the ledge. Into the face of a three-year-old little girl on the other side.Well, actually, it hit the table and just glanced off the side of her face, so the table took the brunt of it. Of course Scott and I feel awful and we fall all over ourselves apologizing, but then we turn to look at each other and go, "Why the hell weren't they glued down?" The bottles used for decoration at any other place are glued down for this very reason. (In fact, the mom of the three-year-old that the bottle viciously attacked said when she saw them, she feared her kid might do the same thing.) I don't know if the other people got a free meal, but they should have. Shit, they should have gotten free meals for a year. Or rename the place to Zoe's. (That was the little girl's name.) Yes, we feel responsible, but moreover, you have to wonder why the hell someone at Carino's thought heavy bottles full of liquid and vegetables just sitting on a ledge was a great way to decorate. Some corporate interior decorator should be fired.
After a good talking to and forcing her to go apologize to the little girl, we left Carino's and headed to Barnes & Noble, simply because I wanted to say hi to a couple people. (Unfortunately, the one person I wanted to see wasn't working. Sigh.)
We were in the kid's section, playing with the train table and this guy came over with his little girl. She was a sweetie, about a year younger than Jocelyn. I noticed a bruise on her head and I asked what happened, and he dad said something about how she had one on her knee too, both from separate incidents. I laughed and said, "Yeah, graceful our child is not."
After a little while, she tired of the trains and decided to go play on the stage. Of course she did. Let's show off! She and the other little girl danced on the stage and were super cute together. Then they went over to a chair. Jocelyn didn't like sharing her chair with the little girl, so she headed back to the stage. Unfortunately for her, Scott was sitting there and she tripped over his feet and she went flying down into the stage, catching her forehead on the edge. We calmed her down, I looked at the other dad and went "As I was saying about the graceful thing."
At that very moment, we noticed the size of the goose-egg on her forehead, and the cut. It was bleeding, but only slightly. Being the momma I am, and being that I used to work at B&N, I went into action. Headed to customer service to get alcohol prep pads that I knew were there, and then headed over to the Cafe to get a bag of ice. (Whereupon she informed me she wanted a "kiki" - that's cookie in Jocelyn-ese - and Scott said she could have whatever she wanted. Darn it kid, that would have been the perfect chance to ask for a pony.) The kid wouldn't let me clean up her head wound, wouldn't let me put ice on it, but she also didn't seem bothered by it - even the friends of the girl I asked to get us ice (she was on her break, and I hated interrupting her break, but poor Robin had a line of like seven people, she wasn't the ideal person to ask) said she was more of a trooper than they would have been.
Jocelyn seemed no worse for wear. We cleaned it up with peroxide when we got home, much to her chagrin. But beyond that, you'd think she didn't even know it happened. She had a fine disposition, she didn't mess with it. The only thing that sucked was that we went to the party over where she goes to daycare and EVERYONE asked what happened to her head. I realize how stupid "She fell at Barnes & Noble," sounds, but it is the truth. Maybe I should tell everyone, "She tripped over her daddy's feet. All his fault."
Well, she's smart as all get out anyway, it's only fair that she got a lesson in karma early in life. It sure as hell won't be her last.
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