Garth Brooks isn't Chris Gaines - he's Brett Favre

The big news this week is that Garth is planning his only arena appearance in December to raise money for the Tennessee flood victims.

First, let me just throw in my $.02 about his concert … shameless attempt to keep himself relevant and in the news. Period. The floods were in May – did it take that long for the news to travel to Oklahoma? There were countless benefits put together immediately afterwards that raised quite a bit of money. What prompted this now, as opposed to after the fact when everyone was throwing money at the cause? Given that, I can only conclude he’s doing this because he needs some publicity, he knows the middle-aged women will still flock to see him, and I’m sure, deep down, he’s having a competition to see if he can single-handedly raise more money than the other benefit concerts.

Down cynic, down girl.

Okay, but to my point … does anyone else notice that Garth Brooks is the Brett Favre of country music?

I’m going to retire.
No, wait.
No, really, I’m going to retire.
No, wait.
For sure this time, I’m going to retire.
Well, maybe just one more season.
I cheated on my wife and everyone hates me, so I’m going to hide from public view now until this blows over – then I’ll make a comeback, just you wait.

You know what ticks me off the most about the whole thing?

Both of them do this because they know the public salivates over a “will-he-or-won’t-he” waiting period every time it comes up. Will Brett actually retire? Will Garth finally come out of hiding for a concert?

Here’s what’s really funny – Brett’s post-Green Bay seasons have been disappointing (well, so I’ve heard – I don’t pay much attention to him, I am one of the few, apparently), and I’ve also heard that Garth’s Vegas concerts are disappointing as well. Hmmm, just one more correlation between the two. Coincidence?

Look, I know what people say … Garth reinvigorated country music, grabbing fans from other genres. Well, kudos to Garth. Woohoo. Brett, he’s apparently one of the best quarterbacks of all time (well, he was until a few years ago). Woohoo. You both have your place in history. That is the key word here though guys, history. Let it go. Move on.

I probably could draw more parallels if I felt like doing actual research, but, I’m lazy. And I really just don’t care.

The fact is, they are both old – they can’t run around, lighting guitars on fire like they used to. A body can only handle so much before it breaks down.

Personally, I feel both of these guys should let their bodies continue to break down in peace. As long as I don’t have to hear about either one, I’ll be completely and totally happy.