Unfair warfare

It's really not fair. Where's the justice in this world when your two-year-old is being the biggest pain in the ass one moment, and the next they are asleep on your chest, and your heart melts? I mean, honestly. How can you be strong, stick to your convictions (and punishments) when they melt you into a big ol' pile of goo?

It does make me think - how much would things be different if everything in life worked this way.

Tiger Woods
Elin: "I can't believe you cheated on me, you bastard." *hits him with a nine iron*
Tiger: "I so sorry." *insert puppy dog eyes here* "I still wuv you."
Elin: "I love you too."


Sadaam Hussein
The U.S. Military who found Sadaam: "George W. Bush sends his regards."
Sadaam: "Shhhhh, I hiding. If you are too loud, the bad men will hear you." *pulls covers over his head* "Shhhh."
The U.S. Military: "Where'd he go?"

George Washington
"I cannot tell a lie. I didn't cut down the cherry tree, nope, nope, nope. I didn't. Nope, nope, nope."


Kate and Jon Gosselin
Kate: "You are so worthless. You never pull your weight around here, you're out chasing tail, seriously, did you forget we have eight children you have to help take care of? I swear we are so through."
Jon crawls up into Kate's lap, wraps her hair around his finger, and subsequently falls asleep.
Kate runs her fingers through his hair. "Aww, I love you. Let's have another eight kids and give the Duggars a fun for their money."

Anyway ... you get the idea. It's the ultimate escape clause, forgive and forget. Let's just hope Osama bin Laden doesn't use this tactic when he's found. Can you imagine?

**ADDITION 4/13/10**
God, she did it again. She's been grabbing at my face at night, scratching the hell out of me in the process. The way we've been combatting that is holding her hands down (not hurting her, but pissing her off) and telling her she has to be nice to Mommy. What does she do after that? She grabs her purple silky blanket, and rubs it on my face, oh so gently, just like I do to her when she's trying to go to sleep.

Weakened by the cuteness.